Volcanos of Puke

Well,

I would apologize for not posting anything Friday night...but it was definitely for the better, considering it would have been full of senseless grammar errors and nonsensical gibberish.  Well, the short of this is basically I hosted a party Friday night for my friends to come over and have a few drinks and play some poker.  Well, the drinks definitely happened...not so much the poker though.

The guest list: Myself, Ashley, Ricky, Busta, Justin, Katie, Rob, Mario, Tim and Lori. 

Breakdown by Guest:

Ashley: The lightweight queen.  Her consumption levels: Mild.  She nursed her wine coolers and had a few shots.  Not the biggest drinker by far, but at least I didn't have to hold her head over a toilet all night.

Ricky: The entertainer.  Consumption levels: Moderately High.  The first guest to show up, and the first to down a four loko with me.  As he became more inebriated, he became more entertaining...with the peak of hilarity resting in the moment that he busted into my bedroom where Ashley and Lori were chilling and said, "Lori! Can I have your number?"  He then left the room and exclaimed "I got it! Oh yea!"  This would also be the man who got us half off the pizza.

Justin: The mild one.  He pretty much just showed up and had a few drinks, nothing extraordinary.

Katie:  Eh, idk really

Rob: The married one.  Drank with the whole, "I don't give a fuck what she says when I get home" vibe going on.

Mario:  The sober one.  This is the man you call any time you need a DD, someone to laugh at you while you're wasted, or while there is an abundance of females who are single.

Tim: The alcoholic, beer edition.  Simple enough, show up, drink 7 beers, talk smack in a wasted man's ear, take off.

Lori: The only single female.  Pro drinker #1 right here.  Yet she always keeps her composure (when I'm around).  Also, the amount of attention garnered from married and single men alike that night was unfathomable.  Hot stuff around the party scene, and she didn't even have to try.

Me: The host.  I didn't do too much fantastic.  I drank at about the same rate as Lori, but I definitely felt it harder than she did.  Other than that, I played video games and made phone calls from a dark closet.

Busta: THE Party Killer. This man deserves a paragraph dedicated to his ability to turn every party member sober within 5 seconds.


In short, this man showed up 4 hours late, and decided to try to keep up with the alcoholics (mainly the single one again) and failed miserable.  He then vomited on my couch, fell onto the floor, stood up, fell onto the other couch, and required supervision at a constant until 5am...which I did.  Moral of this story, for you not-so-often drinkers: don't try to impress a pretty girl by matching her drink for drink...especially when she's had a 4 hour head start on you.  Vomit, in general, doesn't impress ladies all that much.

Saturday was pretty quiet.  The two neighbors from my floor dropped by to see if I was partying again, but I answered no, due to the current lack of furniture (as it is still at the dry cleaners). 

Sunday was uneventful as well.  I played Fable III from 2pm until 12am, and finished it. Excellent game I may add.  It really was amazing. The story is a tad short, hitting about 20 hours if you do everything, but it gets expanded once you finish the storyline to keep you going for another 10-15. 

As of right now, the night is uneventful, consisting of me working my ass off on Sociology homework, trying to make sure that I can spend the next two days strictly studying for my Accounting II exam on Thursday. 

Well, my friends, this is farewell for the day.  Thanks for reading and remember, as my Sociology book has told me, "Men don't pay for sex, men pay to leave."